How to Manage Stress When You’re Grieving: Self-Care Strategies for September and October

As the seasons begin to change and the fall season unfolds, many people look forward to the cooler weather and upcoming festivities. But if you’re grieving, this time of year can bring anxiety and a sense of dread, knowing that the winter holidays are just around the corner. 

The anticipation of holiday stress, compounded by grief, can feel overwhelming. However, by taking soft proactive steps in September, you can ease some of the emotional burden and better prepare yourself for the challenges ahead. Here are some self-care strategies to help you navigate this difficult time.

Your grief is as unique to you as is your fingerprint. You are your best guide in your unique grief. The strategies I write below will not work for 100% of grieving people. They won’t work 100% of the time for you, but they will work more often than not. Trust yourself. 

1. Prioritize Rest and Relaxation

Getting enough rest is crucial, especially when you’re grieving. Establish a calming bedtime routine that might include reading, taking a warm bath, or listening to soothing music. Additionally, make it a habit to unplug from screens and social media regularly. Taking breaks from the digital world can help reduce mental clutter and anxiety.

2. Establish a Self-Care Routine (Back to Basics)

One of the most effective ways to manage stress is to establish a consistent self-care routine. Exhausting idea, right? Start with the basics: Rest, Drink Water, Eat Food, Move Your Body, Go Outside. When you have the energy and bandwidth: start your day with a few minutes of mindfulness or meditation to center yourself and reduce anxiety. Incorporating gentle movement, such as walking, yoga, or stretching, into your daily routine can also help release tension and improve your mood.

3. Nurture Yourself with Small Pleasures

Amidst the challenges, indulge in any small pleasures that may remind you that life is still worth living, and that may even begin to bring you joy. Grief and joy can exist together. Whether it’s enjoying a favorite meal, spending time in nature, or returning to a beloved hobby, these activities can provide moments of comfort. Noticing “glimmers”, small beautiful moments of your day, amidst your grief, can also shift your perspective and offer a bit of light during dark times. People often recommend a gratitude journal. My favorite is The Five-Minute Journal, but for 2+ years in my most heartbroken days, I just used it to record glimmers. I treasure those journals now.

4. Prioritize Activities That Bring Comfort and Allow You to Express Your Feelings

Grief can feel so heavy, and finding ways to express your feelings can be therapeutic to lighten the weight on your heart.. What you feel you can heal. Consider keeping a journal where you can write down your thoughts and emotions as they arise. Creative activities like drawing, painting, knitting, or cooking can also offer a sense of comfort and joy during difficult times.

5. Invite In a Lush Eco-system of Support. You Deserve This in Your Grief, and Always.

You don’t have to navigate your grief alone in this season or the next. You deserve a lush ecosystem of support in your grief, and always. Reach out to this grief coach, therapist, support group, or a TRUSTED friend to talk about what you are experiencing in your heartbreak. Sharing your burden can lighten the load; being witnessed in your grief is vital to your healing.  When your energy and bandwidth allow, it might also be helpful to prepare an emergency contact list of people you can turn to if you’re feeling particularly low and need immediate support, because sometimes you will forget that people care for you.

6. Start Planning for the Holidays (Grief Version)

Exhausting, right? Even as an idea, but hear me out. While it might seem early, September is a good time to start thinking about how you want to approach the holidays. If traditional holiday plans feel too painful, consider creating new traditions or finding alternative ways to spend the holidays that might bring you more comfort and peace. Outline specific coping strategies for the season, such as taking breaks during gatherings, having an exit strategy, or setting aside time for solitude, or opt-out altogether. Give yourself permission every day to let the day be the day, and permission to change your mind.

Conclusion

Grieving during the winter holidays is incredibly tough, but by taking better care of yourself now, you can create a strong foundation of self-support for the coming months. It is crucial to prioritize your well-being and make choices that support your healing journey. As September unfolds, give yourself the care and compassion you deserve, knowing that these actions will help you navigate the winter holidays with less suffering and a bit more peace.

Email list, free download, waitlist…For more personalized holiday support, download my free resource,  or join the waitlist for my Holiday Grief Course, which starts December 5. If you’re looking for one-on-one guidance, explore my private coaching services to help you through this season.